How can Ego affect a Relationship

Relationships  are based upon mutual trust and love. They cannot be taken for granted. One has to constantly work towards maintaining the relationship. Most of the time couples try their best to make sure that they get along. They try to sort out matters amicably and also adjust with each others attitudes and living styles. No doubt, a harmonious relationship would mean that there would be peace in the house and those having children would also be able to ensure that their relationship does not affect the healthy growth of the child.

Sounds very idealistic, but this is not the case all the time. Many times relationships go sour, because partners are not able to adjust with each other. In most of the cases, it is the ego which mars the relationship. Couples often are not willing to compromise with their ego. Each one would like to have his or her own way. In case of an  argument, they would not like to accept the fact that they are at fault. Such kind of  an attitude leads to disharmony and eventually a breakup.

Since ego is  a major cause of a relationship breaking down, it is better to understand how ego can affect a relationship.

How ego causes a breakup ?

• Each partner feels superior to the other and is not willing to listen to the other person.
• The feeling that one is right is often the cause of disharmony. A partner is not willing to accept defeat and feels that his or her point of view is correct.
• Making compromises may be difficult. In order to make a compromise, one has to forgo one’s ego. Some couples may have problems doing so.
• Male chauvinism often causes separation of partners. A man usually likes to keep a control on his woman, particularly in the East, and may not like a woman trying to be assertive.
• A liberated woman may like to assert her ego over her man’s . She may not like to compromise on her views in case she feels she is right. Also she would like to show her man that she is also equally intelligent to handle situations and take decisions on her own. This approach can lead to friction between the couples.

Why must one nurture a healthy ego

It is obvious that one must have a healthy ego to have a successful relationship. A bloated ego can be of much concern, as it can prevent two people coming closer to each other. A person with a healthy and normal ego, will attract more people towards him or herself. It will be easy for him or her to keep up close relationships. Such a person can make compromises easily. A person with an inflated ego will be disliked by many people.

In the West, most of the divorce cases are due to ego problems. People divorce over flimsy reasons. Even a small issue can  be made  into  a major one as one’s ego is hurt. In the East, traditionally, a woman is supposed to keep check on her ego in a  marriage relationship. Most of the time, she remains subdued. This is another extreme situation, which is also not representative of a healthy relationship.